Abandoned

I feel lonely. I feel rejected. I feel unwanted. I feel unloved.

Sad

Last night I was sad and when you asked me why I said I didn't know. I lied. I do know why I'm sad. I'm sad because I miss romance. I miss the words and notes and gestures and touches that told me how much I mean to you. I know you love me, but I wish you'd show it more, the way you used to. I need to hear it, not just the words but the feeling behind them. I want to feel you needing me. I hardly ever feel that anymore. I want you to treat me like your greatest treasure. And as if that didn't hurt enough, I wake up to find a note from someone else, saying things only you should be saying...and all I can do is fight back the tears, wishing those words were from you instead.

Me

Ugly. Fat. Worthless. Lazy. Indulgent. Stupid. Not good enough. I hate me.

One Sided

You don't even grasp how much I need you. You don't see or understand because you don't feel it...you don't need or even want me. I'm another burden, a chore...not a pleasure. Will it always be this way? Will you ever want me again?

Think there's no job more thankless than Motherhood?

Try Step-Motherhood. I guess there's some fine print to Mother's Day that reads, "Step-mothers do not qualify". Oh well.

Tonight

Tonight you made me feel stupid and completely worthless. Tonight you made your priority clear. Tonight you really really hurt me. Tonight something broke between us. Tonight I hate you. Tonight I hate me too.